Broken meanings and hollow symphonies,
Bright flashing lights that keep me awake at night
Switch OFF your television before it grows legs and beats you up!

My television has legs, it grew them years ago
It can run twenty miles, even in the snow
It talks endlessly about me and everyone it sees
It knows when I'm away because the glass screen turns grey

My television has legs, it chased me around the room
I tried to make it stop so I hit it with the broom 

My television has legs, they are rather long, 
In fact, so much so I felt I had to write this song

My television, it kicked me in the head, 
Now I've got concussion and I'm laid up in my bed

My television came to see me, it brought its fury too, 
It jumped up and down persistently because it felt it wanted to

My television towering over me, zaps my imagination and leaves me feeling swell
My television casts its magic spell, and all appears well